So often in life we get caught up in the day to day and we forget something very important. We forget that we also need to put effort into our relationship with our significant other. Married or not, being in a committed relationship means you CHOSE to be with that person. Something about them was so special to you that you decided they were the person you wanted to spend the majority of your time with. Then life happens.
By life I mean kids, jobs, pets, friends, projects, social media, tv etc. So often we get so caught up in our day to day that we forget that the person we chose to be with requires effort as well. Relationships require work. Good relationships don't just happen, they are cared for and cultivated by both partners.
That is why I say it is so important to date your spouse or significant other. Make an effort to spend quality time together. Not necessarily quantity because, let's be real here, most of us can barely find 5 minutes never mind a whole day or a week to run away together. You take what you can get and make it quality. Some suggestions include a scheduled date every 2 weeks to a month, pay a babysitter if you must, it will be worth the investment. Take a walk together or go for a hike. Plan a bedtime date night where you spend time together talking, not watching TV or scrolling on social media, once the kids go to bed. Let the kids eat dinner early then let them have extra technology time while you and your SO eat dinner together and talk. There are so many ways to make time for your SO. You just need to make an effort to say it's worth the effort.
When on your date spend time reminiscing about moments in your past that brought you joy and visualizing moments in the future that you would like to create together. Talk about your goals. Support each other in your endeavors. Share your desires for your relationship and just know this could be awkward from the start but will get easier with time and practice. Don't be afraid to dream together and if one of you isn't quite ready to dream yet, do the dreaming for them and share what you see.
Set goals together for things you want to do when life changes courses again. When you date your spouse you get to know them now and see how much things have changed. You get to change together when you communicate. Otherwise when your life changes again and you find yourselves alone together you can also find that you were so caught up in life that you no longer know each other. You don't want to find yourself living in a house with a complete stranger or, worse, a roommate you know nothing about. When I say date your spouse, I say it with importance and urgency.
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